Since we got back from camping in the New Forest, where Ella roamed in relative freedom with other people's kids, I've let Ella off the leash a little. She's pretty sensible and road safety aware so she's now allowed to cycle unsupervised around the few streets that make up our neighbourhood.
She gets a taste of freedom, I get a break and everyone's happy.
The other day she made a friend while out on her bike. Ella doesn't go to school in the village so it's a wonderful thing that she has a new play mate living just seconds away from us. She returned home with a phone number, written on a scrap of paper by the girl's mother, and a verbal invitation to play at their house the next morning.
I was so pleased for her that I called her dad to alter our childcare agreement (he was due to have her that day). I called the mother and found myself rushing into waffle mode in an attempt to prove I'm not a negligent mother. I mean, who else lets their seven year old out alone nowadays?
After gushing about Ella's 'just down the street for ten minutes' boundaries, my having a new baby and Ella needing to do play outside when I'm busy with said baby and she's bored etc etc I eventually paused for breath and New Friend's Mother (NFM) invited me to drop Ella off and stay for a coffee. Lovely.
The next day, I discovered NFM has a HUGE house with a swimming pool and zip wire for the kids to play on. What a result for Ella!
While having tea with NFM, who seems very nice, and her neighbour who had popped round (also very nice) NFM's father-in-law appeared and was introduced to me as "Lord So-and-So". Actually, she said his first name but I've substitituted So-and-So in respect of his privacy.
Now, I've been to boarding school with a Right Honourable so I'm not phased by aristos but I got to thinking that my lower social status might be a barrier to Ella's burgeoning friendship.
I'm sure NFM doesn't expect her daughter to hang out solely with the progeny of nobility, but I suddenly felt acutely aware of the class divide and anxious that I would be found out and promptly discarded along with my daughter.
You see, I still retain a vaguely posh boarding school accent. My parents, a teacher and a retired Army Major, are stoically middle class. The majority of parents at Ella's state school think I'm posh (in the main, they don't 'speak proper like I does' despite living in Henley and they're mainly blue collar workers or can't be arsed to work). It could be misleading to someone I've just met.
However, I'm married to a plumber, I live in low rent accommodation (albeit in a very posh area) and my approach to housework is lax on a good day and fairly shocking the rest of the time.
Also, thanks to her peer group, Ella now says 'fanks' instead of 'thanks', regularly drops her Ts, favours the word 'innit' and has stopped calling me 'mummy' in favour of 'mum'. I may have slipped down the ranks somewhat since leaving school.
So, during tea with NFM I became concerned that Ella and I may soon be deemed to be decidedly NOCD ( a deplorable yet strangely amusing phrase used by Army officers' wives when assessing new aquaintances, their child's new boyfriend/girlfriend etc meaning 'Not Our Class Darling' - and by implication not to be associated with).
NFM asked that I pick Ella up from her play date slap bang in the middle of Alicia's nap time. Because Alicia, and of course I, had suffered an unusually early start that morning I explained how keen I was to stay at home so Little Liss could have her full nap so please could she send Ella home at noon.
Suspiciously, to me anyway, she offered to drop Ella off instead (it's less than a minute's walk to my house). I casually breezed 'no need to worry, I am happy for Ella to make her own way back' whilst secretly cringeing at the current disarray of my home and garden.
Unfortunately, NFM ignored my preference and turned up at my teeny tiny two bedroom bungalow with her kids and Ella.
Thank god they didn't come to the door but, horrendously, they lingered by the gate - gazing in wide eyed surprise/horror at the knee high grass on my lawn (we've been away for godsake and busy, um, very, very busy), John's white van parked outside and the rolls of old carpet dumped in next door's garden (they're in the middle of redecorating).
To quote that floppy haired chap in Four Weddings and a Funeral Oh f*ck. F*ckity f*ckity f*ck.
On the bright side, J has now mowed the lawn in a fit of shame and I have taken to sweeping the floors once a day (it used to be once a fortnight) - and am contemplating mopping them in the near future. Once I figure out where we keep the mop...
Thursday, 2 September 2010
Saturday, 31 July 2010
My Girl's Seven!
On 19th July my darling eldest daughter turned seven. It's such a cliche but I can't believe how quickly she has grown up. I guess if cliches weren't so true and relevant they wouldn't be cliches as no one would say them.
She is such a kind, loving, intelligent, funny, beautiful girl. She makes my heart swell with pride.
Els had a birthday treat with me on Sunday (the day before her birthday). - pony riding at a lovely equestrian centre in Checkendon
and then three of her best gal pals over for junk food and birthday cake.
I couldn't face an actual party due to having a newborn to care for plus the fact that J had a lad's night out in London and wouldn't be around to help until noon. Anyhow, she didn't seem to mind that the celebrations were fairly low key this year.
I nearly made a hash of Nigella's Victoria Sponge recipe (oven too hot) but managed to disguise the obverly brown crust with pink buttercream icing and jelly sweets. The cake was a big hit thank god!
She opened her pressies on Monday (her birthday) before school and then her dad took her and a few friends to the Build a Bear shop in the Oracle. There are distinct advantages in having two families (two birthday celebrations, two Christmasses!).
Monday, 26 July 2010
Birthing Alicia
Hmm, my newborn is now five, nearly six, weeks old and although I've visualised myself many times blogging about her birth - and other events of the last few weeks - I haven't quite managed to act. Shame, as I've now told the story so many times I am no longer gagging to give a blow-by-blow account. However, I do want to record at least an outline of the day, or rather dayS plural, for posterity. So here goes...
I got the birth I'd hoped for. It was a lot longer than I'd imagined but I kept calm throughout, apart from a slightly panicky/'I want to give up' 20 mins towards the end (when I was probably in transition). I also dealt with the pain incredibly well considering a) it bloody hurt way more than I remembered b) I had a LOT of strong contractions over a 27 hour period - although, insultingly, I was only in 'established labour' for 10 hours c) if I stub my toe the whole world knows about it - I would consider my pain threshold to be fairly low.
Yes, not even a toot of gas and air passed my lips. Well, not till afterwards when my nether regions got aquainted with needle and thread. I put this down to the hypnobirthing course and CDs helping me to be relaxed and to deal with the pain without fear, the wonderful nurturing warmth of the birthing pool, and the amazing support of lovely hubby J and fab friend and birthing partner Sarada.
Oh, and I found that blowing on the outbreath, mooing and making low, loud 'ooooh, aahh, eeh' noises helped me cope through the contractions. Unfortunately, my voice is still not quite back to normal as I was quite vocal throughout the 27+ hours and had only just recovered from a rather persistent cold so my poor ole vocal chords took quite a bashing.
The contractions were all in my back and greatly soothed by massage, heat packs and encouraging words. Thankfully, I had a wonderful sense of time distortion which meant my one minute contractions felt like ten seconds and the two or three minute pauses in between became twenty minute rest breaks, so much so that I even fell asleep during them!
J had really set up the sitting room beautifully. He'd cleared some of the furniture to the garden shed to create space, covered the floor with cotton sheets on top of plastic sheeting, set up 12 hours of chillout music on the Ipod (which we had to replay!), inflated and filled the pool, dimmed the lights and had Roman Chamomile essential oil burning in the oil burner. Deeply relaxing.
I was often encouraged by Mary the midwife to get out of the pool and walk around to speed things up (hah!) but much preferred languishing in the warm water and trancing out in my liquid labourland. Around 3am on Thursday morning (17th June, my niece Sulis's birthday) I got out and went to the bedroom, doubled over cushions on the bed and was massaged and soothed by John through a particularly painful set of contractions. Then - at last! - my waters went with a 'pop' and I got back in the pool hugely encouraged by this sign of progress.
A few hours later I was pushing with all my might, contrary to my birth plan and the hypnobirthing exortation to 'breathe your baby out'. No way Jose. I wanted to PUSH and had no faith that breathing would get my little lady to make her entrance into the world. So push I did, and I was surprised to find that this stage was completely pain free and actually quite satisfying. I didn't even experience the 'ring of fire', just a mild stinging sensation as she crowned.
Reaching down to feel her head was a beautiful moment. I was excited and relieved that it would all be over soon. As it turned out, not as soon as I'd have liked. I was pushing hard for about an hour and Alicia was half way out with just her head and shoulders in the water for ages. Luckily, I'd watched quite a few water births on You Tube and knew that babies could hang around in the water for ages without their being any risk of drowning - they don't breathe until they're immersed in air.
So, there I was with my baby half in and half out for quite some time. I started to lose fiath that she would come out at all and in desperation asked 'can someone please just pull her out. I can't do this any more'. Mary asked me to stand up and both midwives helped me out of the pool, as I scissored my legs over the sides the rest of Alicia slid out in a gush and Mary caught her and passed her to me. My slippery little baby! I clung to her and just thought 'thank god she's finally here'.
I looked up into J's eyes and saw..abject fear. Not quite what I was expecting. I noticed the midwives' eyes had also widened in surprise and seconds later I found out why. Mary said, 'Anna, we may have to take you into hospital, you've lost more blood than we would like.' Oh, so that was the gush then. Not actually a gush but a haemorrhage. I had my baby in my arms was still in the floaty world of labourland so this turn of events didn't bother me in the slightest. J however was clearly shocked.
A quick injection in my shaking leg to help clot the blood and I was allowed to stay at home. Yay! Here we are a few minutes later...
A job well done by all!
See my previous post for pictures of Alicia looking distinctly less blue..
I got the birth I'd hoped for. It was a lot longer than I'd imagined but I kept calm throughout, apart from a slightly panicky/'I want to give up' 20 mins towards the end (when I was probably in transition). I also dealt with the pain incredibly well considering a) it bloody hurt way more than I remembered b) I had a LOT of strong contractions over a 27 hour period - although, insultingly, I was only in 'established labour' for 10 hours c) if I stub my toe the whole world knows about it - I would consider my pain threshold to be fairly low.
Yes, not even a toot of gas and air passed my lips. Well, not till afterwards when my nether regions got aquainted with needle and thread. I put this down to the hypnobirthing course and CDs helping me to be relaxed and to deal with the pain without fear, the wonderful nurturing warmth of the birthing pool, and the amazing support of lovely hubby J and fab friend and birthing partner Sarada.
Oh, and I found that blowing on the outbreath, mooing and making low, loud 'ooooh, aahh, eeh' noises helped me cope through the contractions. Unfortunately, my voice is still not quite back to normal as I was quite vocal throughout the 27+ hours and had only just recovered from a rather persistent cold so my poor ole vocal chords took quite a bashing.
The contractions were all in my back and greatly soothed by massage, heat packs and encouraging words. Thankfully, I had a wonderful sense of time distortion which meant my one minute contractions felt like ten seconds and the two or three minute pauses in between became twenty minute rest breaks, so much so that I even fell asleep during them!
J had really set up the sitting room beautifully. He'd cleared some of the furniture to the garden shed to create space, covered the floor with cotton sheets on top of plastic sheeting, set up 12 hours of chillout music on the Ipod (which we had to replay!), inflated and filled the pool, dimmed the lights and had Roman Chamomile essential oil burning in the oil burner. Deeply relaxing.
I was often encouraged by Mary the midwife to get out of the pool and walk around to speed things up (hah!) but much preferred languishing in the warm water and trancing out in my liquid labourland. Around 3am on Thursday morning (17th June, my niece Sulis's birthday) I got out and went to the bedroom, doubled over cushions on the bed and was massaged and soothed by John through a particularly painful set of contractions. Then - at last! - my waters went with a 'pop' and I got back in the pool hugely encouraged by this sign of progress.
A few hours later I was pushing with all my might, contrary to my birth plan and the hypnobirthing exortation to 'breathe your baby out'. No way Jose. I wanted to PUSH and had no faith that breathing would get my little lady to make her entrance into the world. So push I did, and I was surprised to find that this stage was completely pain free and actually quite satisfying. I didn't even experience the 'ring of fire', just a mild stinging sensation as she crowned.
Reaching down to feel her head was a beautiful moment. I was excited and relieved that it would all be over soon. As it turned out, not as soon as I'd have liked. I was pushing hard for about an hour and Alicia was half way out with just her head and shoulders in the water for ages. Luckily, I'd watched quite a few water births on You Tube and knew that babies could hang around in the water for ages without their being any risk of drowning - they don't breathe until they're immersed in air.
So, there I was with my baby half in and half out for quite some time. I started to lose fiath that she would come out at all and in desperation asked 'can someone please just pull her out. I can't do this any more'. Mary asked me to stand up and both midwives helped me out of the pool, as I scissored my legs over the sides the rest of Alicia slid out in a gush and Mary caught her and passed her to me. My slippery little baby! I clung to her and just thought 'thank god she's finally here'.
I looked up into J's eyes and saw..abject fear. Not quite what I was expecting. I noticed the midwives' eyes had also widened in surprise and seconds later I found out why. Mary said, 'Anna, we may have to take you into hospital, you've lost more blood than we would like.' Oh, so that was the gush then. Not actually a gush but a haemorrhage. I had my baby in my arms was still in the floaty world of labourland so this turn of events didn't bother me in the slightest. J however was clearly shocked.
A quick injection in my shaking leg to help clot the blood and I was allowed to stay at home. Yay! Here we are a few minutes later...
A job well done by all!
See my previous post for pictures of Alicia looking distinctly less blue..
Sunday, 4 July 2010
Alicia Lily
My gorgeous daughter, Alicia Lily Higgs, was born at 6am on 17th June at home into water. More about the birth later (it went well, no pain relief thanks to hypnobirthing and the support of my fab birth companions John and Sarada - but it was tough at times and took bloody ages!).
Here are some photos of our little angel...
with big sister Ella...
with mummy and daddy...
milk drunk...
Here are some photos of our little angel...
with big sister Ella...
with mummy and daddy...
milk drunk...
Tuesday, 15 June 2010
Birth Plan
What with a strong urge to hibernate, even though I'm sleeping better at night now, and an increase in period-like twinges I think Alicia may make an appearance before the weekend.
I can't wait to meet her!
Once she's here (and I'm compos mentis enough to write a post) I thought it would be interesting to compare my hopes for the birth with the reality. So, here's my birth plan:
BIRTH PREFERENCES FOR ANNA HIGGS
GENERAL
I have SPD (Pelvic Girdle Pain), and cannot open my legs wider than hip width without discomfort.
Ideally, I plan to have a water birth at home with either no or minimal pain relief e.g. gas and air.
I have been preparing for birth with the Natal Hypnotherapy CD and ask that you use the term ‘surges’ instead of contractions and refrain from discussing pain, hurt or time predictions (ie how long I will take) as I would prefer to listen to my body and not feel under pressure to perform.
Please don’t offer medication or labour enhancing procedures unless requested or there is a danger to myself or the baby. If you think intervention is necessary, please give us half an hour to ourselves to make a decision. Please explain: How it will be helpful. What the risks are. Why you think it must be done now. What might happen if we wait another hour. What the advantages and disadvantages are. This may be a routine procedure, but please explain what other approaches there are.
FIRST STAGE
No artificial rupture of membranes. Minimal vaginal examinations – avoiding lithotomy position due to SPD.
Labour to be allowed to take its natural course without reference to ‘moving things along’ or ‘augmenting labour’. In the event of a slow/resting labour I prefer to use natural oxytocinon stimulation and to have the privacy to do so.
Encouragement to drink regularly and go to the toilet.
Please keep conversation to a minimum and where possible direct questions to my husband (especially in the more serious parts of labour) so I can focus on maintaining a calm, relaxed state. I would prefer no trivial conversation so that I can focus on birthing.
My birthing environment to have dimmed lighting, soft music and hypnobirthing CDs playing.
Minimal, intermittent hand monitoring. Help me avoid feeling observed, keeping my birthing environment calm and private with minimal people, talking and monitoring.
Encourage me to breathe quietly and rhythmically through each surge (contraction), with a long exhalation through the mouth.
Slowly say the words ‘3..2..1..relax Anna’ I have heard this so many times on the natal
hypnotherapy CD and it will trigger me to relax and breathe deeply, facilitating an easier birth.
If I request pain relief, initially please take this as a request for more emotional support and encourage me instead e.g. ‘you’re doing really well’, ‘the surge will be over soon and then you can rest’, ‘you’re strong, you can do this’ etc. If I continue to ask for pain relief despite your emotional support and encouragement, I would prefer to have gas and air and for you and/or my husband to help coach me with breathing (slow and rhythmic breathing, longer outbreaths) and massage. If I
request stronger pain relief then a minimal dose of pethidine to be administered.
I would like the freedom to have the pool temperature regulated to my own comfort, and for you to encourage me to leave and re-enter the pool in the first stage of labour as and when I wish. However, I am happy for you to check both the temperature of the water and my temperature, to make sure that I remain comfortable.
DURING BIRTHING
Again, during transition I would appreciate any additional encouragement and emotional support you can give me – reassurance that the baby’s nearly here, I’m doing well etc.
I would like to remain in the pool for waterbirthing. Please do not coach me to push as I will be using mother-directed breathing to allow the natural expulsive pulsations of the body to help the baby descend. I think I will prefer to give birth in a supported kneeling position or on all fours.
Please encourage me to reach down to feel my baby’s head when crowning.
I welcome any help/coaching you can give to ensure my perineum remains intact. Episiotomy only if necessary and use of anaesthetic for this procedure.
FOLLOWING BIRTHING
Immediate skin-to-skin contact with baby placed on my stomach or chest. No wrapping of baby.
Father to place his hand on baby’s back under warming blanket. Baby to remain with me in the pool for an hour before weighing etc. Encourage me to get baby to suckle a few times to assist with natural placenta delivery.
Cord to be clamped only after pulsation has stopped. Father to cut cord.
Allow vernix to be absorbed into baby’s skin – delay ‘cleaning or rubbing’.
No vitamin K orally or by injection.
I can't wait to meet her!
Once she's here (and I'm compos mentis enough to write a post) I thought it would be interesting to compare my hopes for the birth with the reality. So, here's my birth plan:
BIRTH PREFERENCES FOR ANNA HIGGS
GENERAL
I have SPD (Pelvic Girdle Pain), and cannot open my legs wider than hip width without discomfort.
Ideally, I plan to have a water birth at home with either no or minimal pain relief e.g. gas and air.
I have been preparing for birth with the Natal Hypnotherapy CD and ask that you use the term ‘surges’ instead of contractions and refrain from discussing pain, hurt or time predictions (ie how long I will take) as I would prefer to listen to my body and not feel under pressure to perform.
Please don’t offer medication or labour enhancing procedures unless requested or there is a danger to myself or the baby. If you think intervention is necessary, please give us half an hour to ourselves to make a decision. Please explain: How it will be helpful. What the risks are. Why you think it must be done now. What might happen if we wait another hour. What the advantages and disadvantages are. This may be a routine procedure, but please explain what other approaches there are.
FIRST STAGE
No artificial rupture of membranes. Minimal vaginal examinations – avoiding lithotomy position due to SPD.
Labour to be allowed to take its natural course without reference to ‘moving things along’ or ‘augmenting labour’. In the event of a slow/resting labour I prefer to use natural oxytocinon stimulation and to have the privacy to do so.
Encouragement to drink regularly and go to the toilet.
Please keep conversation to a minimum and where possible direct questions to my husband (especially in the more serious parts of labour) so I can focus on maintaining a calm, relaxed state. I would prefer no trivial conversation so that I can focus on birthing.
My birthing environment to have dimmed lighting, soft music and hypnobirthing CDs playing.
Minimal, intermittent hand monitoring. Help me avoid feeling observed, keeping my birthing environment calm and private with minimal people, talking and monitoring.
Encourage me to breathe quietly and rhythmically through each surge (contraction), with a long exhalation through the mouth.
Slowly say the words ‘3..2..1..relax Anna’ I have heard this so many times on the natal
hypnotherapy CD and it will trigger me to relax and breathe deeply, facilitating an easier birth.
If I request pain relief, initially please take this as a request for more emotional support and encourage me instead e.g. ‘you’re doing really well’, ‘the surge will be over soon and then you can rest’, ‘you’re strong, you can do this’ etc. If I continue to ask for pain relief despite your emotional support and encouragement, I would prefer to have gas and air and for you and/or my husband to help coach me with breathing (slow and rhythmic breathing, longer outbreaths) and massage. If I
request stronger pain relief then a minimal dose of pethidine to be administered.
I would like the freedom to have the pool temperature regulated to my own comfort, and for you to encourage me to leave and re-enter the pool in the first stage of labour as and when I wish. However, I am happy for you to check both the temperature of the water and my temperature, to make sure that I remain comfortable.
DURING BIRTHING
Again, during transition I would appreciate any additional encouragement and emotional support you can give me – reassurance that the baby’s nearly here, I’m doing well etc.
I would like to remain in the pool for waterbirthing. Please do not coach me to push as I will be using mother-directed breathing to allow the natural expulsive pulsations of the body to help the baby descend. I think I will prefer to give birth in a supported kneeling position or on all fours.
Please encourage me to reach down to feel my baby’s head when crowning.
I welcome any help/coaching you can give to ensure my perineum remains intact. Episiotomy only if necessary and use of anaesthetic for this procedure.
FOLLOWING BIRTHING
Immediate skin-to-skin contact with baby placed on my stomach or chest. No wrapping of baby.
Father to place his hand on baby’s back under warming blanket. Baby to remain with me in the pool for an hour before weighing etc. Encourage me to get baby to suckle a few times to assist with natural placenta delivery.
Cord to be clamped only after pulsation has stopped. Father to cut cord.
Allow vernix to be absorbed into baby’s skin – delay ‘cleaning or rubbing’.
No vitamin K orally or by injection.
Tuesday, 8 June 2010
Elephant Feet
My feet and ankles have really puffed up in the last few days. On Friday, when it was really hot, I looked as if I had elephantitis! Thank god for my Bite flip flops - they have adjustable uppers which have saved me from being completely housebound. There's no way I could cram my feet into anything else at the moment.
I've been having insomnia at night and craving naps in the day. Now that half term is over I fully intend to embrace my new nocturnalism when necessary. Bless her, Ella was a star yesterday. She had an Inset day so was at home with me. I had hardly slept the previous night and was dead on my feet.
She plonked herself in front of the TV and said she didn't mind have a relaxing day, let me snooze on the sofa and even brought me a drink. Such a sweetie! It was only when her dad came to collect her after 3pm I realised that all we'd had for lunch was a bowl each of natural yoghurt and blueberries (made by Ella). Oops! I'm sure he'd have given her a hearty dinner.
Only a few days to go until my due date. I look fit to burst, although I think Alicia may make her grand appearance closer to father's day (20th) than her due date (10th). For the moment, I'm content to potter round the house, enjoy the sunshine and calmly wait. I would love it if she proves me wrong though!
I've been having insomnia at night and craving naps in the day. Now that half term is over I fully intend to embrace my new nocturnalism when necessary. Bless her, Ella was a star yesterday. She had an Inset day so was at home with me. I had hardly slept the previous night and was dead on my feet.
She plonked herself in front of the TV and said she didn't mind have a relaxing day, let me snooze on the sofa and even brought me a drink. Such a sweetie! It was only when her dad came to collect her after 3pm I realised that all we'd had for lunch was a bowl each of natural yoghurt and blueberries (made by Ella). Oops! I'm sure he'd have given her a hearty dinner.
Only a few days to go until my due date. I look fit to burst, although I think Alicia may make her grand appearance closer to father's day (20th) than her due date (10th). For the moment, I'm content to potter round the house, enjoy the sunshine and calmly wait. I would love it if she proves me wrong though!
Thursday, 3 June 2010
Bella May
I have a new niece!
Bella Mae Holford finally popped out two weeks after her due date on 31st May. I am so proud of Jules because she managed to avoid intervention and stuck with just gas and air despite a fairly long labour and some complications such as meconium in the water. She stuck to her guns and insisted on being left to it as much as possible, and finally got the natural birth she deserves.
Here's Bella with big sister Sulis:
and with Granny (my sister, Jules, in the background):
snoozing in the garden:
having a cuddle with mum:
Like me, Jules' first birthing experience was fairly medicalised and scary. I have faith that I can have a similarly satisfying experience second time around. I'm much better prepared this time, having done a hypnobirthing course with John and diligently listening to the hypnobirthing and natal hypnotherapy CD which prepares you mentally for being able to cope well with birth - Jules listened to it too and really thinks it helped.
I prefer the natal hypnotherapy CD as the affirmations make sense to me, it encourages me to practice my breathing (long outbreath, in through the nose and out through the mouth) and the guided beach meditation is so relaxing that I usually end up snoozing through it (luckily it still works if you're asleep!).
I've also read a few books which have convinced me that childbirth doesn't have to be an ordeal:
Childbirth without Fear,
Hypnobirthing
Birthing from Within
These books have also equipped me with the confidence to recognise when certain medical interventions are unnecessary and how to refuse procedures when appropriate to avoid the 'cycle of intervention' (when one medical procedure leads to another and another..increasing the risk of forceps or caesaraean delivery which could have been avoided). They aren't dogmatic though, and I realise that certain procedures in specificn situations may well be helpful. So I will go into boirth with an open mind...
I'm crossing my fingers that Alicia Lily is more punctual than her cousin. I'm due in a week and I'm so keen to meet her. To avoid Jules' agonising, frustrating wait for her new baby I'm telling myself and others that "My due date is 10th June so I'm expecting to drop any time from 10th to 24th June". Or when I'm feeling particularly laissez-faire "I'm due sometime this month".
I'm so keen to meet Bella but unsure about making the 3-4 hour roundtrip when so heavily pregnant. I popped into Reading today, a 20 minute drive away, got measured for a nursing bra, went into H&M for some cute (and brilliantly cheap) baby clothes, stopped for a drink at a cafe and then drove back home. I was completely knackered after that. My SPD/Pelvic Girdle Pain really kicked in during my gentle waddle through the Oracle - despite wearing my tubigrip - so I'm now staggering about the house like an old granny.
Luckily, my lovely sister has told me to stay put this weekend and that they'll come and visit me in a few weeks' time to show off Bella and meet Alicia.
Bella Mae Holford finally popped out two weeks after her due date on 31st May. I am so proud of Jules because she managed to avoid intervention and stuck with just gas and air despite a fairly long labour and some complications such as meconium in the water. She stuck to her guns and insisted on being left to it as much as possible, and finally got the natural birth she deserves.
Here's Bella with big sister Sulis:
and with Granny (my sister, Jules, in the background):
snoozing in the garden:
having a cuddle with mum:
Like me, Jules' first birthing experience was fairly medicalised and scary. I have faith that I can have a similarly satisfying experience second time around. I'm much better prepared this time, having done a hypnobirthing course with John and diligently listening to the hypnobirthing and natal hypnotherapy CD which prepares you mentally for being able to cope well with birth - Jules listened to it too and really thinks it helped.
I prefer the natal hypnotherapy CD as the affirmations make sense to me, it encourages me to practice my breathing (long outbreath, in through the nose and out through the mouth) and the guided beach meditation is so relaxing that I usually end up snoozing through it (luckily it still works if you're asleep!).
I've also read a few books which have convinced me that childbirth doesn't have to be an ordeal:
Childbirth without Fear,
Hypnobirthing
Birthing from Within
These books have also equipped me with the confidence to recognise when certain medical interventions are unnecessary and how to refuse procedures when appropriate to avoid the 'cycle of intervention' (when one medical procedure leads to another and another..increasing the risk of forceps or caesaraean delivery which could have been avoided). They aren't dogmatic though, and I realise that certain procedures in specificn situations may well be helpful. So I will go into boirth with an open mind...
I'm crossing my fingers that Alicia Lily is more punctual than her cousin. I'm due in a week and I'm so keen to meet her. To avoid Jules' agonising, frustrating wait for her new baby I'm telling myself and others that "My due date is 10th June so I'm expecting to drop any time from 10th to 24th June". Or when I'm feeling particularly laissez-faire "I'm due sometime this month".
I'm so keen to meet Bella but unsure about making the 3-4 hour roundtrip when so heavily pregnant. I popped into Reading today, a 20 minute drive away, got measured for a nursing bra, went into H&M for some cute (and brilliantly cheap) baby clothes, stopped for a drink at a cafe and then drove back home. I was completely knackered after that. My SPD/Pelvic Girdle Pain really kicked in during my gentle waddle through the Oracle - despite wearing my tubigrip - so I'm now staggering about the house like an old granny.
Luckily, my lovely sister has told me to stay put this weekend and that they'll come and visit me in a few weeks' time to show off Bella and meet Alicia.
Monday, 26 April 2010
Things You May Not Know About Me
Hari at Thank you for the days has tagged me with 'I bet you didn't know..'. I need to write a list of things you may not know about me. OK, brace yourselves. Here goes...
1. I once jumped 10,000 feet out of a perfectly good Cessna with a fifteen stone man strapped to my back
2. One of the things I'm most proud of is that I started my own free festival, Come Together, in my beloved home town of Henley-on-Thames. People said it couldn't be done, so I did it with no prior experience and no cash - just a vision of providing 'fun for free' for all the different types of people in the area (rich, poor, young, old) and a willing bunch of friends who helped get it off the ground.
It ran for 5 years as a self-funded event, we didn't make any money from it (purposely) and attracted thousands of revellers - one year I even spotted Led Zeppelin's Jimmy Page and Robert Plant in the crowd.
3. I appeared on Blockbusters aged seventeen. I wore my Slayer T-shirt (thrash metal band) and had my nose pierced and my hair was dyed black. I was paired with another girl from my school who wore a jumper with a picture of a sheep on it. I would dearly love to still own a copy of that show. We must have looked a picture ;-)
4. I once saved a little boy's life. I was eight years old and noticed the boy walking down steps into a pool. I looked for his parents as I had a funny feeling that something bad was going to happen. They were canoodling in the shallow end nearby but not paying any attention. In seconds, the boy was floating towards me, unmoving, face down in the water. I picked him up, put him back on the step and patted his mum on the back and pointed at her crying son. I didn't tell anyone exactly what had happened as I was worried they wouldn't believe me and would somehow think it had been my fault.
5. I was chased by a baby giraffe and hid in someone's house to get away from it (they were out, so my mum told me off afterwards. But what was I to do?). It was terrifying. I was living on a small game reserve in Zimbabwe at the time BTW. Oh, and we didn't go to school or have any home schooling for six months. Just played and had adventures all day. It was bliss.
6. I went to boarding school from the age of ten, when I had to fly from Germany to the UK with just my little brother for company (with a bit of help from a volunteer lady who escorted minors onto planes). I LOVED boarding school.
7. When I was thirteen, I got suspended from school for a month. A week after my return, I got expelled. I wasn't sorry. It was a Roman Catholic school and we had to say 'Hail Mary' twice a day by the statue of the Virgin Mary amnd go to a full mass once a week whatever our religious beliefs or lack therof. The school was run by misogynistic jesuits. The headmaster used to be a millionaire and had given it all up to become a priest. He was an alcoholic and used to wander around the school pissed with a harris hawk on his shoulder (yes, a real live one)
8. In my twenties I achieved Size Eight status. It was marvellous and I still had boobs...
9. I was once hypnotised in Reading train station against my will. Really.
10. I smoked pot every day for over fifteen years. At one point I was such a pot head that I would have a spliff as soon as I'd woken up - before my morning cup of tea. Even on a working day. Actually, that's a lie - it wasn't a spliff it was a huge bong. After years of trying, I finally kicked the habit thanks to Patrick Holford's fabulous book How to Quit Without Feeling S**t which covers every addiction from sugar through to heroin.
11. I have lived, and loved, in Henley for nearly twenty years. Once, I was in my local pub with a girl friend when she asked 'Is it just me, or is this pub full of your ex-boyfriends?'. On closer inspection of the 12 or so punters, I discovered that I had indeed dated EVERYONE in the pub.
12. I have nice straight teeth. This wasn't always the case. I had years of train track braces and horrendous-looking orthodontic headgear which I only wore at night depsite my dentist's advice to the contrary. No way was I wearing that in front of boys!
13. I used to speak French quite well and could watch French films without subtitles and understand them (sadly this is no longer the case). I also used to study Latin and nearly did it for GCSE.
14. I am a course/workshop junkie. I love trying new things. Workshops/courses I have done include: djembe hand drumming, yoga, tai chi, jewellery making, salsa, ceroc, krump, bellydancing, massage, Reiki, Pranic healing, shiatsu...
15. I used to be a keen chorister at school and achieved Grade 5 RSA singing. I would have gone to Grade 8 but I couldn't get my head around music theory as I didn't play an instrument at the time. I've sung solo in front of hundreds of people.
16. I am a PADI Rescue Diver and have scuba dived with sharks (small reef ones mind you, I'm not that brave) and dived shipwrecks in UK, Wales and the Red Sea.
17. I declined my school's recommendation that I sit the Oxbridge exams (admissions for Oxford and Cambridge universities) when I found out how much work would be involved (lots. I never ended up going to university, instead choosing to be a waitress live a life of hedonism for three years (not much different from going to Uni then).
18. Before I die I would like to: go whale watching, see the Northern Lights, become a better mother, wife and friend, make a difference.
1. I once jumped 10,000 feet out of a perfectly good Cessna with a fifteen stone man strapped to my back
2. One of the things I'm most proud of is that I started my own free festival, Come Together, in my beloved home town of Henley-on-Thames. People said it couldn't be done, so I did it with no prior experience and no cash - just a vision of providing 'fun for free' for all the different types of people in the area (rich, poor, young, old) and a willing bunch of friends who helped get it off the ground.
It ran for 5 years as a self-funded event, we didn't make any money from it (purposely) and attracted thousands of revellers - one year I even spotted Led Zeppelin's Jimmy Page and Robert Plant in the crowd.
3. I appeared on Blockbusters aged seventeen. I wore my Slayer T-shirt (thrash metal band) and had my nose pierced and my hair was dyed black. I was paired with another girl from my school who wore a jumper with a picture of a sheep on it. I would dearly love to still own a copy of that show. We must have looked a picture ;-)
4. I once saved a little boy's life. I was eight years old and noticed the boy walking down steps into a pool. I looked for his parents as I had a funny feeling that something bad was going to happen. They were canoodling in the shallow end nearby but not paying any attention. In seconds, the boy was floating towards me, unmoving, face down in the water. I picked him up, put him back on the step and patted his mum on the back and pointed at her crying son. I didn't tell anyone exactly what had happened as I was worried they wouldn't believe me and would somehow think it had been my fault.
5. I was chased by a baby giraffe and hid in someone's house to get away from it (they were out, so my mum told me off afterwards. But what was I to do?). It was terrifying. I was living on a small game reserve in Zimbabwe at the time BTW. Oh, and we didn't go to school or have any home schooling for six months. Just played and had adventures all day. It was bliss.
6. I went to boarding school from the age of ten, when I had to fly from Germany to the UK with just my little brother for company (with a bit of help from a volunteer lady who escorted minors onto planes). I LOVED boarding school.
7. When I was thirteen, I got suspended from school for a month. A week after my return, I got expelled. I wasn't sorry. It was a Roman Catholic school and we had to say 'Hail Mary' twice a day by the statue of the Virgin Mary amnd go to a full mass once a week whatever our religious beliefs or lack therof. The school was run by misogynistic jesuits. The headmaster used to be a millionaire and had given it all up to become a priest. He was an alcoholic and used to wander around the school pissed with a harris hawk on his shoulder (yes, a real live one)
8. In my twenties I achieved Size Eight status. It was marvellous and I still had boobs.
9. I was once hypnotised in Reading train station against my will. Really.
10. I smoked pot every day for over fifteen years. At one point I was such a pot head that I would have a spliff as soon as I'd woken up - before my morning cup of tea. Even on a working day. Actually, that's a lie - it wasn't a spliff it was a huge bong. After years of trying, I finally kicked the habit thanks to Patrick Holford's fabulous book How to Quit Without Feeling S**t which covers every addiction from sugar through to heroin.
11. I have lived, and loved, in Henley for nearly twenty years. Once, I was in my local pub with a girl friend when she asked 'Is it just me, or is this pub full of your ex-boyfriends?'. On closer inspection of the 12 or so punters, I discovered that I had indeed dated EVERYONE in the pub.
12. I have nice straight teeth. This wasn't always the case. I had years of train track braces and horrendous-looking orthodontic headgear which I only wore at night depsite my dentist's advice to the contrary. No way was I wearing that in front of boys!
13. I used to speak French quite well and could watch French films without subtitles and understand them (sadly this is no longer the case). I also used to study Latin and nearly did it for GCSE.
14. I am a course/workshop junkie. I love trying new things. Workshops/courses I have done include: djembe hand drumming, yoga, tai chi, jewellery making, salsa, ceroc, krump, bellydancing, massage, Reiki, Pranic healing, shiatsu...
15. I used to be a keen chorister at school and achieved Grade 5 RSA singing. I would have gone to Grade 8 but I couldn't get my head around music theory as I didn't play an instrument at the time. I've sung solo in front of hundreds of people.
16. I am a PADI Rescue Diver and have scuba dived with sharks (small reef ones mind you, I'm not that brave) and dived shipwrecks in UK, Wales and the Red Sea.
17. I declined my school's recommendation that I sit the Oxbridge exams (admissions for Oxford and Cambridge universities) when I found out how much work would be involved (lots. I never ended up going to university, instead choosing to be a waitress live a life of hedonism for three years (not much different from going to Uni then).
18. Before I die I would like to: go whale watching, see the Northern Lights, become a better mother, wife and friend, make a difference.
Sunday, 25 April 2010
Baby Shower and Water Birth
I got together with some of my favourite fabulous females yesterday who threw a Baby Shower (my first!) for me. The sun shone, we ate Greek Meze al fresco and spent a relaxing afternoon in each other's company.
I always feel that girlie gatherings are particularly good for the soul. They remind me how lucky I am to have such kind, caring, interesting people in my life.
The impending arrival (only 6 weeks to go!) of Alicia Lily (yes, we have decided on a name. And it's pronounced 'alisseeya' not 'aleesha' BTW) was celebrated in style and both she and I were truly spoiled with lovely gifts including a Wilkinet baby carrier.
Wilkinets supposedly take a bit of getting used to at first as there's a special way to tie them, but they come highly recommended from several friends for their versatility and comfort for mum/dad and baby. Plus they hold the baby in an optimum position for their spine, as well as taking the weight off your own shoulders and back. I'm looking forward to practising my tying technique with El's Baby Annabel!
I start my maternity leave on 10th June - 4 weeks before my due date. I was intending to work till 2 weeks before, but am finding my memory and concentration dwindling and my thoughts turning more and more to babies, stuff I need to by for baby, things I need to do before baby arrives etc.
After a good hour (or more) of idle surfing the other day I'd nearly talked myself into buying one of these instead of a moses basket. As fab as they sound, I figure that I'd be making a rod for my own back though if Alicia has 6-9 months of being able to rock herself to sleep I can't imagine how nightmarish the transition to a cot would be.
My usually eclectic mix of books 'on the go' (I often flit between 3 or 4 fiction and non-fiction books on various subjects in the same month until I've finished them all, then don't read for a week or so and then repeat the process) has now been reduced to Secrets of the Baby Whisperer and Gentle First Year. I love the approach of both, they're quite inspiring.
I'm particularly keen on Gentle First Year's recommendation to get your partner to massage you daily with Rose oil for four weeks post partum (to stave off the 'baby blues' and promote healing), after which you can take over the job yourself. Hmm. As lovely as he is, I am hard pushed to get even a five minute foot rub off J more than once a month.
I'm being a good girl and listening to my natal hypnotherapy CD pretty much every day which is making me feel optimistic that this time my birthing experience can be calm, powerful and within my pain threshold. I was pretty shaken after Ella's birth and felt quite cheated that I had been induced and not supported to 'do it properly' (my feelings at the time, not now).
Thanks to some 'healing past birth trauma' work with my hypnotherapist friend Hari - writer of the hilarious blog Thank you for the Days - a great hypnobirthing course which has also really given J confidence that he can support me in labour and, of course, the CD I just mentioned I'm hopeful that I will have the relaxed water birth at home that I would really love.
Check out these testimonials if you're sceptical that birth can be satisying and not agonising. Oh, and cross your fingers for me please!
Gratuitous Bump Shot:
I always feel that girlie gatherings are particularly good for the soul. They remind me how lucky I am to have such kind, caring, interesting people in my life.
The impending arrival (only 6 weeks to go!) of Alicia Lily (yes, we have decided on a name. And it's pronounced 'alisseeya' not 'aleesha' BTW) was celebrated in style and both she and I were truly spoiled with lovely gifts including a Wilkinet baby carrier.
Wilkinets supposedly take a bit of getting used to at first as there's a special way to tie them, but they come highly recommended from several friends for their versatility and comfort for mum/dad and baby. Plus they hold the baby in an optimum position for their spine, as well as taking the weight off your own shoulders and back. I'm looking forward to practising my tying technique with El's Baby Annabel!
I start my maternity leave on 10th June - 4 weeks before my due date. I was intending to work till 2 weeks before, but am finding my memory and concentration dwindling and my thoughts turning more and more to babies, stuff I need to by for baby, things I need to do before baby arrives etc.
After a good hour (or more) of idle surfing the other day I'd nearly talked myself into buying one of these instead of a moses basket. As fab as they sound, I figure that I'd be making a rod for my own back though if Alicia has 6-9 months of being able to rock herself to sleep I can't imagine how nightmarish the transition to a cot would be
My usually eclectic mix of books 'on the go' (I often flit between 3 or 4 fiction and non-fiction books on various subjects in the same month until I've finished them all, then don't read for a week or so and then repeat the process) has now been reduced to Secrets of the Baby Whisperer and Gentle First Year. I love the approach of both, they're quite inspiring.
I'm particularly keen on Gentle First Year's recommendation to get your partner to massage you daily with Rose oil for four weeks post partum (to stave off the 'baby blues' and promote healing), after which you can take over the job yourself. Hmm. As lovely as he is, I am hard pushed to get even a five minute foot rub off J more than once a month.
I'm being a good girl and listening to my natal hypnotherapy CD pretty much every day which is making me feel optimistic that this time my birthing experience can be calm, powerful and within my pain threshold. I was pretty shaken after Ella's birth and felt quite cheated that I had been induced and not supported to 'do it properly' (my feelings at the time, not now).
Thanks to some 'healing past birth trauma' work with my hypnotherapist friend Hari - writer of the hilarious blog Thank you for the Days - a great hypnobirthing course which has also really given J confidence that he can support me in labour and, of course, the CD I just mentioned I'm hopeful that I will have the relaxed water birth at home that I would really love.
Check out these testimonials if you're sceptical that birth can be satisying and not agonising. Oh, and cross your fingers for me please!
Gratuitous Bump Shot:
Monday, 1 March 2010
Powims
Ella is always writing cute notes - to me, to John, to herself. Usually about how much she loves us, often a request for food or TV.
The other morning, on seeing the note to John from Ella asking him to make her porridge despite his having to rush to work in the mornings (he made it for her before I got out of bed at 7 - even though she doesn't usually eat brekkie that early) I thought I'd write a note for her:
Ella is pretty and kind
and fun and lovely xxx
So she wrote one back to me:
mum is butifal
and fun kind pashant (patient)
and dus never get to
angry that much I love my mummy
I love you xxxxxxx
Then she suggested we write one together for John:
John is handsome (me)
and fun and very kind (both)
and kind wen he's abot to go he helps me (El)
and he gives great hugs (me)
Then Els wrote one about all of us. By this time she had written at the top of the paper: Powims.
We are all happy and playful
we are all loveing and gentle
and kind we are
all peasefall and
understanding
Cute.
I cut them out and they're all on my fridge, making me smile ten times or more a day.
The other morning, on seeing the note to John from Ella asking him to make her porridge despite his having to rush to work in the mornings (he made it for her before I got out of bed at 7 - even though she doesn't usually eat brekkie that early) I thought I'd write a note for her:
Ella is pretty and kind
and fun and lovely xxx
So she wrote one back to me:
mum is butifal
and fun kind pashant (patient)
and dus never get to
angry that much I love my mummy
I love you xxxxxxx
Then she suggested we write one together for John:
John is handsome (me)
and fun and very kind (both)
and kind wen he's abot to go he helps me (El)
and he gives great hugs (me)
Then Els wrote one about all of us. By this time she had written at the top of the paper: Powims.
We are all happy and playful
we are all loveing and gentle
and kind we are
all peasefall and
understanding
Cute.
I cut them out and they're all on my fridge, making me smile ten times or more a day.
Monday, 15 February 2010
Juggling Baby, Money, Time and Happiness
I've just worked out that my total maternity leave 'income' after I have my baby in June will be around £600/month! Hmm, that'll just about cover our Tescos trips and running my car then ;-)
Of course, hubby will be contributing on top of the government's handouts (my £600 of self-employed person's statutory maternity pay, child tax credit and child benefit) but we only just seem to manage on our joint finances as it is. Aargh!
Someone I know is taking a whole year off for maternity leave and has the first 6 months on full pay and the remaining 6 months on half pay...
Jealous? Moi?!
I'm fretting a little as I really want to spend some quality time with my new baby, but I'm aware as an equal breadwinner I will need to contribute to the family finances much, much sooner than a year after giving birth.
And that first year with Ella was one of the most special, blissful times of my life. I don't want to muddy my last ever experience of My Baby's First Year with stress about money, childcare, deadlines etc
I hope it all works out for us, I know these things usually do. I'm considering working two hours a day while the baby has her afternoon nap when she's somewhere between three to six months old (depending on my bank balance, her sleeping through the night and my sanity levels at the time). Then, putting her in daycare or at a childminder's for 1.5-2.5 days a week when she's one year old and I'm more emotionally equipped to 'give her away'. See, I've sorted it out already but I'm still not sure if that's the right plan to achieve maximum happiness and fulfilment. Which is the only goal worth having in my book.
Sometimes I fantasise about being a 1950s housewife and being able to 'just' be a mum. I tried that with my first baby though, and ended up going back to work after 18 months (instead of the four or five years I originally intended!) as I realised I need more of a balance (and more stimulation) in my life.
Having to juggle conflicting priorities is what we mums do best, whether we stay at home, go to work or do a bit of both. No path is entirely without its stresses, strains and missed opportunities. Oh and guilt, of course.
I just wish I could chill out about this whole work/baby/money/time balance thing and trust in my future. I mean, she isn't even here yet and I'm getting my knickers in a twist about it all.
J reminded me recently that not so many years ago I was a single mum with a toddler, working four days a week, paying for half of Ella's childcare and all of my rent and household expenses, with no maintenance payments.
I managed fine all by myself then and, although I was more stressed and tired than I am nowadays and almost constantly pining for more time with Els, I was pretty content with my lot.
Overall, things are bound to be easier this time around. And I am infinitely resourceful. And all the best things in life are free. Apart from organic food and chiropractors and Eve Lom cleanser and visiting friends when they don't live on your doorstep and broadband and pretty clothes and family-friendly festivals and miracle vitamin supplements and random purchases from Amazon and...
Of course, hubby will be contributing on top of the government's handouts (my £600 of self-employed person's statutory maternity pay, child tax credit and child benefit) but we only just seem to manage on our joint finances as it is. Aargh!
Someone I know is taking a whole year off for maternity leave and has the first 6 months on full pay and the remaining 6 months on half pay...
Jealous? Moi?!
I'm fretting a little as I really want to spend some quality time with my new baby, but I'm aware as an equal breadwinner I will need to contribute to the family finances much, much sooner than a year after giving birth.
And that first year with Ella was one of the most special, blissful times of my life. I don't want to muddy my last ever experience of My Baby's First Year with stress about money, childcare, deadlines etc
I hope it all works out for us, I know these things usually do. I'm considering working two hours a day while the baby has her afternoon nap when she's somewhere between three to six months old (depending on my bank balance, her sleeping through the night and my sanity levels at the time). Then, putting her in daycare or at a childminder's for 1.5-2.5 days a week when she's one year old and I'm more emotionally equipped to 'give her away'. See, I've sorted it out already but I'm still not sure if that's the right plan to achieve maximum happiness and fulfilment. Which is the only goal worth having in my book.
Sometimes I fantasise about being a 1950s housewife and being able to 'just' be a mum. I tried that with my first baby though, and ended up going back to work after 18 months (instead of the four or five years I originally intended!) as I realised I need more of a balance (and more stimulation) in my life.
Having to juggle conflicting priorities is what we mums do best, whether we stay at home, go to work or do a bit of both. No path is entirely without its stresses, strains and missed opportunities. Oh and guilt, of course.
I just wish I could chill out about this whole work/baby/money/time balance thing and trust in my future. I mean, she isn't even here yet and I'm getting my knickers in a twist about it all.
J reminded me recently that not so many years ago I was a single mum with a toddler, working four days a week, paying for half of Ella's childcare and all of my rent and household expenses, with no maintenance payments.
I managed fine all by myself then and, although I was more stressed and tired than I am nowadays and almost constantly pining for more time with Els, I was pretty content with my lot.
Overall, things are bound to be easier this time around. And I am infinitely resourceful. And all the best things in life are free. Apart from organic food and chiropractors and Eve Lom cleanser and visiting friends when they don't live on your doorstep and broadband and pretty clothes and family-friendly festivals and miracle vitamin supplements and random purchases from Amazon and...
Thursday, 28 January 2010
Can't Sleep
Can't sleep. Again.
Insomnia is partly due to pregnancy, partly doing tax return this evening, and partly J stressing me out just before bedtime about me stressing about tax return.
I've cleared my work inbox and fired off all the 'must get round to doing those' email actions that have been hanging around for a week. Imagine the faces of clients and colleagues alike when they check their emails tomorrow morning, urrr, later this morning, and see missives from yours truly sent at 1.40am!
Am in grave danger of getting an undeserved reputation as a workaholic.
God bless Ebay. I've just rounded off my productive insomnia session with a spot of soporific* shopping.
I have bought:
1. A lavender and hops sleep pillow bag
2. A maternity body support cushion
3. A maternity parka coat. OK, so it won't help me sleep but I'm fed up of the rain and wind attacking my midline now that my normal coats won't do up over my bump.
Right, am finally tired. Nightie night xx
*Don't you just love this word? Hardly get a chance to use it, but love to slip it in when I can.
Insomnia is partly due to pregnancy, partly doing tax return this evening, and partly J stressing me out just before bedtime about me stressing about tax return.
I've cleared my work inbox and fired off all the 'must get round to doing those' email actions that have been hanging around for a week. Imagine the faces of clients and colleagues alike when they check their emails tomorrow morning, urrr, later this morning, and see missives from yours truly sent at 1.40am!
Am in grave danger of getting an undeserved reputation as a workaholic.
God bless Ebay. I've just rounded off my productive insomnia session with a spot of soporific* shopping.
I have bought:
1. A lavender and hops sleep pillow bag
2. A maternity body support cushion
3. A maternity parka coat. OK, so it won't help me sleep but I'm fed up of the rain and wind attacking my midline now that my normal coats won't do up over my bump.
Right, am finally tired. Nightie night xx
*Don't you just love this word? Hardly get a chance to use it, but love to slip it in when I can.
Friday, 8 January 2010
Snow Nutters
My friends in the West Country sent me a video of them skiing in their back garden. Very impressive. I like to see people making the most of our weather instead of grumbling about it.
But then I was told about someone snowboarding through Henley town centre a few nights ago, towed by a jeep! I didn't quite believe it until I saw this.
That looks pretty fast.
I'm speechless.
But then I was told about someone snowboarding through Henley town centre a few nights ago, towed by a jeep! I didn't quite believe it until I saw this.
That looks pretty fast.
I'm speechless.
Tuesday, 5 January 2010
My High Fives - What are Yours?
I've just been tagged by A Mother's Ramblings with this High Five Meme. I need to list my top five highlights of 2009 and then tag five other bloggers to list theirs.So here goes:
1. Getting Married
This is something I've wanted to do since I was sixteen. Due to a penchant for choosing unsuitable men (up until recently of course!) and a tendency to mistake pure lust for love, I've had to wait until the grand old age of thirty-six to marry the Love of my Life. They say the best things come to those who wait.
2. Scuba Diving in Thailand
I used to be a hardcore diver, happy to plunge into the icy depths of the Channel and the Irish Sea in nothing more than a semi-dry (for all you non-divers that's neoprene that is 7mm thick on the arms and legs, and14mm thick on the torso and looks like this).
Since having Ella I've become a committed holiday diver, and a very infrequent one at that. Diving and kids don't mix too well (it's often a pricey holiday and what the hell do you do with your little ones when you're underwater - leave them on the boat with a bunch of strange men?).
Diving with John during our honeymoon just off Kho Phi Phi island, in the Krabi province of Thailand, was a really special experience. John started to learn how to dive in the UK six months before our holiday, doing both his Open Water and Advanced courses so that he was qualified to dive to the same depths as me.
The aquatic life was beautiful and plentiful. Watching the fish and holding hands with my new hubby under the warm, clear Andaman sea was a big high point of 2009. Shame J put his back out the next day, rending him out of action for diving and other wonderful honeymoon pursuits (yes, including that kind) for the rest of the holiday.
3. Falling Pregnant with Number Two (and finding out my lil sis had beaten me to it)
Ever since a year after Ella was born, I have hoped to give her a sibling. I was resigning myself to the fact that I wouldn't ever have another child - firstly due to no suitable potential father, and then once I'd met and fell in love with J hearing him protest frequently that he felt too old, impatient and knackered to deal with a baby.
Somehow, miracle of miracles, the tide turned and J agreed to go for it. I gave up booze, he gave up smoking, and 2 months later I was up the duff. Result. I called my sis, the lovely Urban Pixi whose reaction made me even happier: "I was waiting for you to say that, I'm eight weeks pregnant!".
I'm sure you can imagine my delight at being able to share all the strangeness of pregnancy with a loved one who is experiencing the same things, for example:
- A smorgasbord of aches and pains (back, feet, and occasionally feeling like someone has kicked you in the fanny due to SPD)
- Frequent night-time loo trips
- Bizarre bodily happenings e.g. nipples turning from a light cinnamon to a dark chocolate, a constant view of the inside of our belly buttons, butterfly flutters in our tummies from the little bairns.
4. Camping in the Witterings
Me, J and Els and a bunch of our favourite people (with a few sorely missed exceptions) went camping in The Witterings.
The sun shone for days, we lounged on the beach and swam in the sea, played in dinghies, made sandcastles, and - when the kids were in bed - had wonderful al fresco evenings involving much quaffing of wine, lots of giggles and a few ticking offs from the campsite owner for our effusive, and rather loud, conversation post-11pm. Tut tut.
All of the eight kids were pretty good throughout our holiday, so much so that the childless members of the group were charmed and broody in equal measure.
5. Working with SAP BusinessObjects
The marketing agency I get most of my work from had their contract extended to work with another part of SAP, and so I took my first steps into the world of Business Intelligence. I won't bore you with the details, but basically this has increased my hours to about 20-25 per week which has turned out to be a perfect work/life and time/money balance for me.
It has also given me the opportunity to get out of the house more (I usually work from home), thanks to regular partner and internal SAP meetings and at least one day a week working on-site at the SAP BusinessObjects offices. To top it all off, some of the new team and new SAP partners are really fantastic to work with, and the software itself is really interesting. Honestly it is!
2009 has been a fantastic year, and I'm fully expecting 2010 to be the best year yet. I have a fabulous, sexy hubby, a beautiful, intelligent daughter, a job I love, a new baby and a new niece/nephew on the way, lots of time, lots of freedom, enough money, wonderful friends. And I know there's more good stuff coming my way.
Bring it on!
I'm tagging these fabulous bloggers to share their 2009 highlights:
My good friend, and (who knew it until now?) wonderfully warm and witty writer Hari at Thankyou For the Days
Undisputed Queen of the Mummy Bloggers, Susanna at A Modern Mother
Feisty, zany and thoroughly entertaining Jo Beaufoix
The no-holds-barred-make-you-pee-your-pants-with-laughter-yet-often-poignant More Than Just a Mother
And, last but not least, the Uber Parent Amy at And 1 More Means Four who is the personification of calm and good parenting - she has four girls with a boy on the way and manages to hold down a part-time job too. Wow.
I'd love to hear some of your highlights too - leave me a comment and let me know what delights 2009 has brought you.
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